


We didn't start the fire (it was just him)

by DumbassWhoWritesAt3AM



Series: My Crackhead Oneshots [2]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Arson, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Discord - Freeform, Fire, Gen, High School, IRL Fic, Implied Affair between 2 teachers, Not really but they ARE sleeping together, One Shot, Public Endangerment, This takes place in qui_nn's TransInnit universe, What do I put in the tags, accidental arson, attempted manslaughter, but arson happens a lot, home cooked meals, ik all of their stories are seperate, so its canon in ALL OF THEM!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-16 16:08:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29703129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DumbassWhoWritesAt3AM/pseuds/DumbassWhoWritesAt3AM
Summary: Tubbo accidentally (or so he says) burns down his school
Relationships: Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit
Series: My Crackhead Oneshots [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2184765
Comments: 10
Kudos: 119





	We didn't start the fire (it was just him)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [qui_nn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/qui_nn/gifts).



> to qui_nn:  
> 1) I love your Transinnit fics  
> 2) Don't reference Tubbo burning his school down on multiple occasions then expect people not to write about it

It was just another terribly average day at school. 

_Less_ than average. For some reason Tommy had skipped out on it. Apparently he was sick, but Tubbo was used to that. Tommy's parents never checked the validity of those statements, so he got away with being ‘sick’ often.

The school bell rang. Lunch period. 

“Alright class!” said Mr. Sullivan, the 6th form chemistry teacher. “Don’t forget we have a summative assessment on Thursday! I expect all of you to be ready.”

 _Shit,_ Tubbo thought. Today was Tuesday, but he had to record videos that night and Wednesday. He had _completely_ forgotten to study, and now he would have to pull a few all-nighters. 

While the other students were leaving, Tubbo stayed in his spot. 

“Uh, Mr. Sullivan?”

“Yes, Toby?”

“Can I stay in here and study for the upcoming quiz?” There wasn’t much incentive to go to lunch, since Tommy was absent. 

The teacher thought about it for a bit. “Okay, but I have a lunch meeting to go to. Just don’t make a mess or light the place on fire.” Laughing the last part, he picked up his tote bag and left. 

With that, Tubbo was alone. 

He reached into his bag to get out his earbuds, phone, and lunchbag. His notebook and textbook was already on the table. He could eat the chicken and rice he packed while he worked. Tubbo found his lunch, but no earbuds. _I must have left them in my locker._

To make the best of his time, he went over to the microwave, to heat up his lunch while he was away. It beeped as he punched in **1:30** . Before pressing **start** , he stirred it up a bit. 

The halls were empty as he made his way to his locker. It was about halfway across the school, so it was odd that he didn’t run into anybody. 

After retrieving his headphones, he made his way back to the classroom slowly. He wasn’t in a rush to study, maybe to eat, though. There wasn't any microwave in the cafeteria, and even though he usually stirred his food, it didn't taste the sa-

He realized what he had done. He stirred his food, with a _metal_ fork, and then _put it in a microwave._

He booked it the rest of the way to the east wing. 

Thick smoke leaked out of Room 204, the lab. Tubbo’s eyes widened. 

He ran up to the room and, with little thought of the consequences, whipped the door open. He was met with a face full of smoke. Spitting through it, he realized the wall of curtains at the back of the room were on fire. It had spread to some of the posters, as well, and was growing fast. 

Eyes darting around the rest of the room, he saw a fire extinguisher a metre away. Running up to it, he took the pin out and squeezed the handle. Small flecks of white screeched out of the nozzle for less than a second, then stopped. He squeezed again. Nothing. 

_It’s empty?!_

He threw the canister down and ran back into the hallway, right for the fire alarm. As soon as got to it, he pulled it down. 

An ear splitting alarm went off. Wincing, Tubbo ran off to the back exit, the one closest to him.

In a fire drill, they always lined up in homerooms. Tubbo’s homeroom teacher was Miss Mahon, who was also his geography teacher. People soon realized it wasn’t a drill, when 1) the teachers seemed as confused as the children were, 2) one eagle eyed kid spotted smoke rising from the east wing, and 3) two fire trucks showed up. Kids were already taking photos of the scene. 

“Excuse me, Madame?”

Tubbo recognized the voice and felt the pit in his stomach grow. 

Mr. Sullivan continued. “Can I borrow Toby for a bit?”

“Sorry, but that would be against the protocol, Vinnie.” she said in an… _strained?_ voice. “You know we wouldn't want anyone to break protocol, right?”

“Of course not.” he replied, voice still strained. Shooting daggers at the kid, he returned to his own class. 

Tubbo thanked his lucky stars for his homeroom teacher. Otherwise, he suspected he might have been forced back into the burning building. 

They were dismissed early after the firemen had been working for an hour with little dent in the flames. Surprisingly, as his bus pulled out of the school’s parking lot, a news van pulled up. One of his classmates must have sent in a tip. He gathered his own evidence as they rode away from the school. 

As soon as Tubbo got home, he went on discord. To the ‘DreamSMP’ private server, he sent:

 **@TechnoThePig @Simpnap** can’t believe im the first one to commit arson irl pog

He attached a photo of the flames he had taken while leaving school. 

Almost instantly, he got replies. 

_Simpnap:_ Thats photoshopped. Never lie to me ever again

 _BigManInnit:_ tubbo that is Our School? since when is Our School on fire?

 _TechnoThePig:_ Arson pog

 _TechnoThePig:_ I always knew you’d be the first. Good job kid

 _BigManInnit:_ TUBBO WHY IS OUR SCHOOL ON FIRE

 _wimblr suit:_ nice tub

 _TechnoThePig:_ Destroying the government one public building at a time

 _BigManInnit:_ www.greenwichtimes.v=dQw4w9WgXcQ 

> _East Wing of public school in Greenwich caught fire. Quarter of facilities destroyed._ _No known casualties or causes. Firefighters still on the scene._
> 
> _read more at ---_

_BigManInnit:_ TUBBO. DID YOU BURN OUR SCHOOL DOWN

 _wimblr suit:_ wait is this real

 _wimblr suit:_ what

 _tubbee:_ **@BigManInnit** i neither confirm nor deny anything

 _TechnoThePig:_ Wait Tubbo did you actually burn your school down?

 _TechnoThePig:_ I was joking with all the anarchy stuff 

_wimblr suit:_ i dont think it was him. it was probably some embittered principal or somethin

 _TechnoThePig:_ It was a bit

 _tubbee:_ **@TechnoThePig** it was an accident

 _BigManInnit:_ wait does this mean no class?

_TechnoThePig: HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY BURN YOUR SCHOOL DOWN_

_tubbee:_ **@BigManInnit** nope >:D

 _Simpnap:_ wtf? It’s real?

 _Simpnap:_ its too early for this im going back to bed

 _BigManInnit:_ Okay maybe this wasnt your worst idea

That evening, Tubbo was watching the news with his parents. The fire was the top local news story, not because of its tragedy (everyone had gotten out alive, miraculously) but because of... suspected foul play?

“While no witnesses had been in the lab when the fire started, someone had tried to put it out with an already empty fire extinguisher.” The newscaster said. “Firemen at the scene tried the rest of the extinguishers on campus and found them _all_ to be empty.”

It cut to a bit with the Board of Directors, or some other important figure that Tubbo didn't know, saying “This is a very dangerous practice that too many schools are doing. It is a danger to our children.”

The newscaster spoke again. “A lowered budget, or faculty pocketing the money, the police aren’t sure yet. The investigation will continue.”

With that, Tubbo excused himself. He had a video to record. On his way to his room, he heard his mother say “Now who would do such a thing?”

He recorded the video (with many jokes from Tommy and their school burning down), went to bed, and woke up the next morning, refreshed. Remembering the events of yesterday, he went downstairs and turned on the news. 

A different newscaster was covering the same story as before. Apparently, the school board had charged some teachers, and even the _principal_ with attempted manslaughter. They had some photos (mugshots, he later realized), of faculty. He recognized Miss Mahon and the principal, Mr. Cunningham. Mr. Sullivan was nowhere to be seen, which was surprising. 

“The teacher in charge of the chemistry lab where the fire started has apparently fled the county,” said the announcer. 

_Oh._ Tubbo glanced out the window, hoping he wouldn't see the embittered teacher outside, ready to take revenge. He would have to watch his back from now on. 

On the bright side, the science test (along with all classes) was cancelled until further notice. Maybe this wasn’t the worst thing to happen. 


End file.
